The Sloth: Nature's Lion

We all have our favorite animals. Some people like horses so much that they sit on 'em whenever they get a chance. The most dedicated horse fanatics even quit their jobs and hang out in trees all day, waiting for a horse to mosey on by so they can drop down onto its back and enjoy a good sit. Cats have wisely harnessed the power of the internet, rising in popularity with every terrible meme that they propagate. Several writers on this very site have regaled you with tales of endearingly stupid dogs, racking up armfuls of Pulitzer Prize rejection letters for their efforts.

The thing is, most of us are wrong. Our favorite animals are garbage. This is because the sloth exists, and it is the best.

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