One of us is The Thing and it's not me

Listen, I've had about enough of you accusing me of being The Thing. If you recall, I'm the guy who first pointed out we have a Thing situation going on here. That was last week, remember? I said "Guys, the Thing is among us, and we'd better act smart lest we both become victims of The Thing."

If I was The Thing, would I really draw attention to myself? No, I'd just wait until your back was turned and spit out a few gross tentacles to devour you, or grow a giant alligator mouth out of the side of my head and bite your face off. That's the sort of shenanigans The Thing does, and I haven't done any of those things.

You on the other hand have been nothing but Thinglike in your behavior. Sure, you haven't grown any spider legs out of your head and started crawling around the ceiling, but I can tell you're itchin' to do that first chance you get.

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