We Must Stop Mysterious Foe
These are difficult and troubled times for Great Country. The Bad Economy. The Heroic War. The people with their Medical Illnesses. The Expensive Fuel. You lay in bed at night unable to form your mind around the existential nightmare of modern life. You wonder, "What could be at the root of all this?" The Political Opponents want you to believe that there is no easy answer. That everything is relative.
Wrong.
The cause of everything bad could not be more clear. It is Mysterious Foe. This exotic usurper of our once-great nation has infested our country and turned everything good into things that are now bad or bordering on bad unless we act quickly. Such problems he causes may have been foretold in our Important Texts, but this is tangential to the point that Mysterious Foe is the problem.
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