'Da Vinci Code' really does kill Jesus faith!

It seems that tolerant Christians who dismissed "The Da Vinci Code" as just a fictional book forgot that most people think the same thing about the Holy Bible.

Worse, the War of the Books is not looking good for Jesus and his followers.

An outrageous new study of British readers proves that 60% of people who read Dan Brown's silly thriller believe the biblical character Jesus had unprotected sexual intercourse with the character Mary Magdalene and that she repeatedly got pregnant by the self-proclaimed "son of god" and had his babies.

Amusingly, 30% of people who hadn't read the book believed the same thing.

Results of the survey, funded by a U.K. Catholic group, were released today in London.

While the Bible says nothing one way or the other about who Jesus had sexual intercourse with, or how many children he did or didn't have, for some reason it is an important "tradition" to Catholics and Christians that Jesus not only refused to have sexual intercourse with either men or women, but that he even refused the socially-acceptable charade of having a "beard" spouse.

Apparently, the faith of Catholics and Christians everywhere is in great trouble if it turns out that the character Jesus made use of his reproductive organ.

Hilariously, 17% of those who read "The Da Vinci Code" believe the nutty Catholic cult group Opus Dei has been caught murdering people. (Only 4% of those who didn't read the book maintain that Opus Dei members are crazed killers.)

Catholic leaders in Britain have gone totally hysterical over the new survey, with various officials demanding that "health warnings" be affixed to copies of the book or, presumably, tickets for the upcoming film adaptation of the novel.

Link